RSSI Think You Should Leave - Frogcloth
5 January 2026
A guarantee from a mattress company unravels.
You can also read this bizarre fanfic on Archive of our Own.
TIM
Now we're here to talk about Frogcloth mattresses, and I want to start by saying that our mattresses are made with absolutely zero fibreglass. 0%.AUDIENCE 1
Hi, sorry, question, why would you put fibreglass in the mattress?TIM
We wouldn't, that's what I'm saying, there's no fibreglass-AUDIENCE 1
-yeah but what is the reason that you are telling us that you aren't like who's putting fibreglass in the mattresses?TIM
Nobody! Nobody at our company is putting fibreglass in our mattresses! At all!AUDIENCE 2
I heard Forgbounce puts fibreglass in their mattresses.AUDIENCE 3
And lots of other shady companies...TIM
We're not like them! We don't use fibreglass!AUDIENCE 4
And how do we know that?TIM
Because I'm telling you, that's what this is about.AUDIENCE 1
So you wouldn't put any fibreglass in the mattresses?TIM
No!AUDIENCE 2
Did you used to?TIM
What?AUDIENCE 2
Did you used to put fibreglass into the mattresses and then somebody found out and that's why you stopped?AUDIENCE 3
How do we know we're not buying one of the old fibreglass mattresses?TIM
There is no fibreglass! There never was any fibreglass! We've never used fibreglass in our mattresses!AUDIENCE 4
Do you use it anywhere else.TIM
...what?AUDIENCE 4
Do you use fibreglass in your factories?TIM
I mean, it's like insulation it's used like everywhere.AUDIENCE 1
How do we know fibreglass from your factories didn't get into the mattreses?Another audience member pulls out their phone and holds it up. He stands up after a second.
AUDIENCE 5
Why can I find Frogcloth fibreglass on homedepot.comAUDIENCE 3
You really shouldn't shop at home depot...Audience member 4 holds up their phone.
AUDIENCE 4
And amazon.comTIM
We have a different facility that we make fibreglass in, it's not for mattresses!AUDIENCE 2
Would you take a lie detector test.TIM
What.AUDIENCE 2
Would you take a lie detector test to prove you didn't put fibreglass in my mattress!!TIM
You *have* a Frogcloth mattress?AUDIENCE 1
I just don't understand why you're putting fibreglass in our mattresses?OLD MAN IN THE AUDIENCE
No fire.Several audience members nod their heads solemnly.
TIM
I'll take a lie detector test! I'll take any test! You can check, we're registered, we don't use fibreglass in our mattresses.AUDIENCE 4
Guys I just found a video on tiktok of a woman pulling fibreglass out of her Frogcloth mattress...TIM
That's fake it's wrong it's a fake that's cotton candy.AUDIENCE 1
It's cotton candy?TIM
The woman is a fake she used cotton candy I've seen the video!Several audience members are on their phones now.
AUDIENCE 2
It looks real to me.TIM
She's a fraud!!THE WOMAN
Am I?The camera swings over and there's a shocked music sting. The woman is standing with a bag of pink foam.
TIM
It's YOU!THE WOMAN
Talking shit about my videos again.TIM
Miranda you HORSE I told you to stay out of this with you cotton candy games.MIRANDA
I'll show you EXACTLY how serious this is.TIM
Don't you do it Miranda!MIRANDA
I'll eat this fibreglass right here!TIM
Don't you do it!MIRANDA
Frogcloth will never sell another mattress ever again!The camera zooms in on the two of them repeatedly as they stare eachother down.
TIM
Fuck it fine it's full of fibreglass.Everyone begins screaming and booing.
AUDIENCE 1
I knew it!AUDIENCE 2
I can't believe it...AUDIENCE 3
And I trusted you...OLD MAN
It's okay.Tim is leaning on his podium, defeated.
TIM
It's all fibreglass we don't even make foam we just wrap the fibreglass in J-cloths and spray paint them white i don't even give a shit.